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Newsweek joins the Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy in decrying the slumping US economy. Of course, in order to be fair-and-balanced, they offered up some alternative viewpoints.

Lawrence Yun, chief economist at the National Association of Realtors, tells NEWSWEEK that "home sales and prices in most of the country will improve during the second half of 2008."

Last month, Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson said, "We expect to see a faster pace of economic growth before the end of the year."

Nice to see some unbiased analysis of the situation there. Not.

(Yun is the Little Orphan Annie of forecasters. He's always sure the sun will come out tomorrow.)

Not that the Newsweek writer offered up anything more substantial himself.

While businesses—especially those that export—are holding up, the economy is being dragged down by the cement shoes of a freaked-out consumer and a punk housing market.

Since when did "punk" become acceptable journalistic verbiage? That sure ain't in my copy of The Elements of Style. I guess Ashton Kutcher's influence on our cultural foundations was more profound than I realized.

Meanwhile, some of the reactions to the high commodities prices are just plain hysterical.

Last November, retired school principal Barbara McGeary, 75, of Camp Hill, Pa., switched from a Toyota Rav 4 SUV to a Prius. But the savings she realizes are eaten by a higher food bill.

Sure, SUVs are obsolete, oversized, gas-guzzling icons of evil, but a RAV4 isn't that bad, in the grand scheme of things. I mean it is a Toyota, after all. And it's not as if a 70-something retiree is doing a whole lot of commuting, anyway. There's no way the gas savings outweigh the car payments. Not to mention the carbon footprint of the producing new car itself. Whatever makes grandma happy, I guess.

The Stakeout

Way back when, investigators followed suspects to uncover crimes and infidelities. Nowadays, such efforts are reserved for the choicest of gadgets, namely the next version of the iPhone.

All around the trucks, workers wheeled around pallets of the plain brown boxes, some using forklifts, others with hydraulic dollies. A security guard working for the company across the creek from Quanta's facility approached this reporter before a thorough survey could be made.

Oooh, real pulse-pounding stuff there. But oddly fascinating all the same. Mostly because I'm due for a cell phone renewal discount in a couple of months. Glad to see the mainstream press getting into the Apple rumor-mongering business. It's definitely a fresh angle in contrast to the usual wild-eyed speculation.

Are the new iPhones inside? "No, no," he said, before flashing a grin and heading back into the building. "If so, I'm not at liberty to discuss it."

At least the Quanta drones are well-trained. Looks like all shall be revealed at the grand event next week, as ordained by the mothership.

Episode IV: A Nou Camp

The Venetian Macau is a virtual clone of the Vegas version, which was itself a reimagining of the European city. After my most hideous run of losses ever at the gaming tables, I decided that if I'm going to hand over my money I damn well should get something in return. Thankfully, The Venetian has a huge shopping mall attached for just such an occasion.

The canals and gondolas were neat and all, but most of the stores aren't much different from the shops you'd find in downtown in Taipei. The Manchester United Experience was at least something different, in a nauseatingly worshipful kind of way. I didn't particularly felt like paying big bucks to get on that bandwagon, but I was drawn to the cart of clearance goods sitting just outside the front door. Flipped through the scattered pile of unpopular goods and found a big stack of original Barcelona jerseys, 30% off.

I've been tempted to pick up a football jersey before. After all, they're distinctive, instantly recognizable around the world to the cognescenti, and loose jersey made from high-tech fabric is comfortable to wear. However, I've been put off by two things. First, the real-deal jerseys are expensive. Secondly, all the major clubs put sponsor advertising on the front of the jerseys and I'll be damned if I pay big bucks to act as a walking billboard for some corp. But in this case, the Barca jersey is going for 30% off, making it about the same price as your standard Nike sport-jersey. And it turned out that the FC Barcelona is sponsoring UNICEF on its jersey, at least I'd be advertising a good cause.

So I guess now I'm a Barca man by default, which makes it interesting because the SO is actually a Real Madrid fan from way back. The Dry-Fit jersey sure was comfy in the sticky Macau heat, though.