October 13, 2004
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The best opening line for a newspaper article, year-to-date:
Mark Pfeifer loves pumpkin pie more than any sane healthy man should.
Apparently the entire canned pumpkin production in America (all 150,000 tons of it) goes on during these few weeks, from late August to early November. And 80-90% of it comes from Morton, Illinois, where Mr. Pfeifer taste-tests pies made from the cans rolling off the production line.
Pfeifer figures he will have eaten 273 thumb-wide-slices of pumpkin pie by season's end — or more than 34 whole pies.
Of course, the town's embraced the pumpkin as its main claim-to-fame, but being the pumpkin-capital of America is hard work.
"Even if you pace yourself, how could you not get sick of pumpkins?" Badgerow said. "Usually, it's not until October. By then, all you can hope for is to look at a pumpkin pie and not be sick."
Which provides contrast and evidence for the sentiment expressed at the top.
"Some people think I'm deranged, because I still eat pie at Thanksgiving," Pfeifer said.